‘Minute by minute LIVE’ report from the Corona World Cup between Humanity and Humans
The finals of an unexpected event. Only about 8 months ago, no one could ever imagine that this confrontation would take place under such circumstances. The clash of values has been always around but the game was different. People could choose if they want to take part or not. This is different. Now we are all forced to take sides because whether we like it or not, our actions as individuals right now indicate which team we support in this Corona World Cup Finals 2020: Humanity v Humans (LIVE).
EXTRA TIME: HUMANITY 4:4 HUMANS
- 104 MIN. HUMANITY is hanging by the thread in the latter stages of the first extra time of this thrilling final. It needs fresh legs and fresh ideas. Coach Compassion has instructed the whole bench to warm up. There are several players that look like they have had enough. Integrity and Togetherness look knackered, Hope, AKA the aspirant for the player of the match is still limping from the Human Nature’s challenge from the end of the first half, while Kindness and Solidarity faded a bit. Perhaps it’s time to give Learning a chance in defence to deal with Greed and Politics’ determination? Shall we see what can Passion or Understanding add to the mix in the midfield battle? And how about Goodwill upfront to torture Idiocy on the left-wing? Let’s see. We’re going to have 2 added minutes for the first extra-time period.
- 103 MIN. Stupidity hits the post! That was close. The consequent corner was well placed in the danger area by Vanity, where Stupidity raised above all players in the box, hitting a post with a brilliant header. An objective evaluation: HUMANS deserve to be ahead. After an initial diplomatic wobble performed by EU Commission President Ursula Von der Leyen and threats to ban the vaccine exports, it appears that a workable compromise has been made. It is needless to mention that this spat was a mother of all embarrassments, especially from the perspective from the economically weaker countries with vaccination programmes in its very early stages ):
- 101 MIN. Nearly an own goal by Humanity! Humanity nearly self-destructed by scoring a very unfortunate goal after a mediocre combination of Human Nature, Stupidity and Ignorance, following a decent long-range pass from Vanity. Integrity’s interaction deflected the ball only inches away from HUMANITY’s goal. The pharmaceutical company have signed multiple contracts, which proved to be too much to meet and both, UK and the EU want their share at the same time as the vaccination programme speed is being used as a political tool. As a result, it heated up the debate among vaccine nationalists on both sides, depending on a perspective English or La Manche Channel. Both sides have been exhibiting the “our people first” arguments that show zero solidarity as well as very low rationality, given the fact that we’re all in this together. But let’s not be one-sided only and let’s not forget to mention the Covax programme.
- 99 MIN. NO GOAL! We’re still all square. Stupidity tried the Panenka chip intention but it was too slow and the keeper Sane managed to intercept the ball. Those Panenka kicks, they do look cool if they work out but when they don’t – it just looks – stupid? To be fair, Stupidity pulled off a proper shit during this game. It was nearly the best player on the pitch tonight. The failed penalty might be due to tiredom, nerves or perhaps karma? The legendary Mr Panenka himself was treated for Covid-19 by Prague’s hospital staff in the autumn? In spite of few stupid incidents targetting the hospital staff, the majority of the population can appreciate their hard frontline work.
- 98 MIN. PENALTY FOR HUMANS! VAR showed an unintentional contact by Integrity on Stupidity. The spot-kick will be taken by its initiator Stupidity.
- 96 MIN. VAR! Video Assistant Referee or El Var as they call it in Spain will investigate a possible foul on Stupidity by Integrity in the penalty area. A few weeks before Christmas when reports first emerged from Italy of doctors being abused, insulted and physically intimidated by Covid deniers and other various shady groups that have emerged from this madness.
- 94 MIN. As we’ve entered the “vaccination period” of the pandemic, there’s an opinion/practise divide between sharing the vaccine with the whole World or creating profit from the situation. Should everyone have access or should it be on an “our people first” basis? Campaigners warn that 9 out of 10 people in poor countries are set to miss out on the COVID-19 vaccine next year.
- 92 MIN. Team HUMANITY is trying to ease HUMANS’ pressure by smartly holding the ball in the midfield area with Responsibility, Togetherness and Hope exchanging neat one-touch passes. HUMANS appear to be useless without the ball. In response to Covid-deniers, various public figures appeal to the general public to be responsible. In the meantime, the USA adds nearly 1/2 million cases per week and numbers in Europe are surging yet again…
- 91 MIN. HUMANS have started the extra time where they’ve left off in the closing period of the second half. The pressure continues. Idiocy who appear to have recovered from its own goal is now causing problems yet again. False claims that pandemic is a hoax are attracting growing numbers of sympathisers around the world using people’s frustration with their economic situation.
PEEP! EXTRA TIME IS ON THE WAY!
HUMANITY V HUMANS FULL TIME 4:4
We’ve been witnessing a tremendous match between the Team HUMANITY and HUMANS with their nature. The 8 goal thriller is nothing short of an epic show, highlighting the difference in approach of the two contrasting teams. We could have easily seen a half dozen more goals from either side as the woodwork on both sides are still shaking in a permanent tremolo effect. Many of you would have predicted even 1/2 through the second half that the bloody Covid won’t go away just like that so the extra-time appeared to be inevitable ):
- 90+5 MIN. PEEP! FULL TIME 4:4. With India overtaking Brazil in the second place when it comes to the number of cases, and Europe sinking into the second wave, we’re all heading to extra time ):
- 90+3 MIN. NO GOAL. Just before the header, Greed has pushed Decency in a manner that’s outside the rules…
- 90+2 MIN. VAR! Oh dear. Have Humans grabbed it with a late winner? Greed brilliantly headed Politics cross pass Sane. Billions worth dollars of Covid-related contracts are questionable…
- 90 MIN. There will be 5 minutes of added time but it appears that we are inevitably heading to an extra-time ):
- 88 MIN. HUMANS had another decent chance after Selfishness, Ignorance, Stupidity and Politics breaking through the right-wing, passing through Integrity, Togetherness and Responsibility as they weren’t even there. The race for the vaccine is getting dirty…
- 86 MIN. Supported by the tireless Politics, Hate and Fear, Violence is enjoying itself on the pitch right now a lot, it even inspires teenagers ):
- 84 MIN. Both sides are trying to grab a late winner. I guess that no one wants extra time, while we all suspect that it is inevitable. Various vaccines are being pushed forward, the first one comes from Russia after i’s been tested on “voluntary soldiers”. A scene from Chernobyl comes to mind. In the meantime, the Humanity’s team fans think how lucky they are that Human’s coach didn’t bring Mark Zuckerberg into the team. Except for the fact that Facebook’s algorithm has been recently found to ‘actively promote’ Holocaust denial, Zuckerberg’s platform is also funnelling readers towards Covid misinformation ): Mark Zuckerberg would have been a great addition to the Team Humans, many experts agree on…
- 81 MIN. While we’re witnessing a thrilling competition between Humanity and Humans at high intensity, the only winner right now appears to be the bloody virus, as cases double every six weeks globally ):
- 78 MIN. The events are gradually intensifying and the pandemic is still rising. And Politics with Stupidity with Vanity are enjoying their time on the pitch. India, as one of the currently worst affected countries, arrests 50 journalists in clampdown on critics of Covid-19 response ): India has now dropped two places to be ranked 142 out of 180 countries on the global press freedom index ):
- 75MIN. OWN GOAL! 4:4 We’re all square once again! Idiocy’s night turned from bad to worse. Some might call it a horror show. Type “idiot” in Google and hit pictures!
- 72MIN. Another DOUBLE SUBSTITUTION. Humanity reacts fast. Gratitude and Decency are off, Courage and Love are on, which could be regarded as an attacking change. Gratitude had a great game as she was at the centre of many good moments for Humanity but in the last 10-15 minutes, she was barely visible. Decency looks knackered. Love and Courage should be able to bring the much-needed pace in Team Humanity…
- 69MIN. Humanity’s bench is warming up. Gratitude, as well as Kindness, have faded out, while Decency was bullied by Politics and Stupidity on the right-wing, which took its toll on her ability to support the attack. in the last period of the game
- 68MIN. Another chance for Humans. Stupidity is having a fine time on the pitch. Few leaders in Latin America are too arrogant towards the virus, which is translating itself into the huge disproportional numbers of cases and deaths. While the region is home to only 8% of the global population, it nearly comes with half of the recent Covid-19 deaths and it fights its northern counterpart, whose numbers are very high ):
- 65MIN. Politics hits the woodwork. In an old school fashion, Hate kicks the ball towards Stupidity to cross it from the right-wing. The ball ricochets randomly in the box only for Human Nature and Ignorance weak efforts to be blocked by brave Decency, respective Integrity. Politics had a final shot but Sane pushed it away with the tip of his fingers to hit the post. Brazil Government Aide Says COVID-19’s Toll on Elderly Will Reduce Pension Deficit. Is this a new low? Humanity must come up with something, otherwise, it’s just a question of time when they conceive another goal
- 62MIN. The change appears to refresh Humans. They have switched the gear, moving the ball faster and look generally sharper. While Europe is slowly opening up, the focus has shifted over to the Americas. The two most populous countries of the continent have topped the numbers of dead people, reaching. Their truly un-inspirational and hate-mongering leaders are ignoring the threat and mocking those who take it seriously. India is also catching up with Russia in the third-place fast ): RIP to tens of thousands of people around the globe ):
- 59MIN. DOUBLE SUBSTITUTION. The first substitution of the game comes in the Team Humans. Fear and Vengeance are off Prejudices and Violence on. Fear had a good game but in the last few spells, it was barely visible. Vengeance hasn’t shown any of her attacking abilities in what could be considered a poor game for her
- 58MIN. GOAL! HATTRICK! 3:4 Completely against the run of play, Human Nature produced a killer pass, setting Greed to score his third of the night. Since the outbreak, there have been about 51 thousand domains registered in 3 months. Cybercrime is spiking, the attackers are scamming the vulnerable. American consumers reported around 18 thousand cases, frauds, telemarketing attempts or stolen identities, all in connection to the pandemic. Even the right-wing conspiracy theorists are in, trying to cash out on their products, such as “curing” toothpaste and so on. Of course, that’s because they are here for the people, to fight for the traditional values, they say. Humans are a goal ahead again
- 56MIN. ANOTHER YELLOW CARD! The game is turning ugly but the Team Human approach was aggressive right from the beginning. Humans are clearly frustrated by the refreshed Humanity’s side that appears to have momentum going on since the restart. Ignorance nearly knocked Wholeheartedness out with a terrible late tackle. Two French doctors suggested testing the vaccine on poor Africans (:0 If things will carry on this way, we shall see a red card soon!
- 54MIN. YELLOW CARD! Politics is lucky to remain on the pitch after a ruthless cynical foul on Solidarity. Outbidding and competing with each other for protective equipment over the ocean, within state unions has been taking place lately, the US is accused of “modern-day piracy”. Planes with (paid for) medical supplies are also being seized upon refuelling in Turkey. It should have been a straight red. Referee Situation just gave Humans a huge favour
- 52MIN. A chance for HUMANITY. What a game! An amazing one-touch combination involving 7 players! It all started at the edge of the box, between Decency, Integrity and Wholeheartedness. A clever back-flip by the left-back to the space towards speeding Togetherness, whose vision was outstanding, finding Hope in front of him. Gratitude’s clever run misled Humans’ defence meant that Solidarity had an easy job tapping the ball in an empty net but the HUMANS goalkeeper Hate anticipated Solidarity’s move. Excellent effort and great save! People around the globe organise themselves to help the vulnerable.
- 50MIN. Out of nowhere, Idiocy hits the post! Energised by the contact goal, Humanity was enjoying a decent spell of possession in the midfield area but Politics snapped the ball away from a weak Responsibility’s pass, nearly setting up Idiocy to score. BJ refused to sort out the medical equipment shopping together with the EU
- 48MIN. GOAL!! 3:3. We’re all square once again! Change of shape introduced by the coach Compassion are paying off straight away. Togetherness scores after a nice combination of Solidarity and Wholeheartedness on the left wing. In just 15 hours, 170 thousand people signed up as volunteers to help British National Health Service (NHS) to help! Humanity’s back in the game again!
- 46MIN. Another attempt of Humans to surprise Humanity right after the whistle. The optimism on declining numbers of dead from the end of the first half proved to be premature. Sane however saves Fear’s effort comfortably
PEEP! The second half is on the way
No changes in the teams for now. Hope appears to be fine for now. Humanity seems to be changing its shape from the previous 3-4-2-1 to 4-2-3-1. Maybe they want to explore their full backs’ (Decency and Wholeheartedness) pace in the attack, after all, they have 4 goal deficit, which is a long way to go. Something tells me that this match has many more goals in it.
- How did the backpackers approach the outbreak? What were their reactions? Where are they now? Find out here.
- And here’s something far more important about mental hygiene, which is to become a very important thing
In the meantime
Coronavirus had moved from the TV channels and newspapers to our homes. Our friends are contracting it. Everyone, stay well and/or get better soon!
Possible changes and tactical adjustments for the second half
HUMANITY got into a disastrous start, conceiving 2 goals in just 6 minutes. It appears like they have underestimated HUMANS or that their game plan was just unsuitable for the aggressive approach of their opponents. A surprising goal however turned HUMANITY’s fortune, at least for the spell of about 10 minutes, when they have pulled themselves back in the game with the fast goals, levelling the score for a short spell.
HUMANITY however needs to work very hard just to pull few passes together as opposed to the natural pace of HUMANS as well as the current form of HUMANITY’s defence against predatory instincts of HUMANS’ attackers.
The second half will be hard for HUMANITY unless they’ll completely alter their approach and/or pull up some miracle. There were however glimpses of optimism and let’s believe the coach Compassion will find the way how to turn their fortunes, otherwise, it’s looking rather bad for HUMANITY as things stand right now.
HUMANITY’s team coach Compassion gave us only a few words before rushing to the dressing room: “Let’s remember those thousands of souls claimed by COVID-19, but also those claimed by Malaria, Dengue, Hepatitis, Measles and other nasty diseases as well as those who are not with us anymore because of poverty, lack of medical services. Together we can fight them.”
HUMANS remain to be diabolically efficient and pretty straightforward. Often skipping midfield with long balls, they go forward in numbers with pace while their defence remains solid and confident. Having a strong bench, one can speculate that the coach can bring on either Bigotry, Prejudices, Narrow-Mindedness in the second half. Violence and Isolation are also available to refresh their defensive ranks.
HUMANITY had its best player Hope injured just before halftime but it appears that She will be able to continue. Coach Compassion also has a variety of options on the bench. The obvious choice would be bringing on Love, Goodwill or Understanding. But people might also want to see Learning, Courage as well as Open-Mindedness coming on.
HALFTIME: Humanity 2:3 Humans
- 45+3MIN. PEEP! The referee Situation blows the whistle, it’s HALFTIME.
- 45+2MIN. NO PENALTY. FREE-KICK. The incident took place just outside of the box. Shaken Hope stumbles off the pitch, shortly before Kindness blasted the kick in the wall. Army has been called in to help with the burials in Italy because the funeral services are not managing ): Italy however reports a 3rd consecutive day of declining numbers of those who lost their lives to the virus, while Spain expects the peak in the upcoming days. It’s still in hundreds though but some are mentioning that they’ve seen the light at the end of the…
- 45+1MIN. Ouch! YELLOW CARD (Human Nature) and VAR! Possible penalty for Humanity. Humanity appears to have an injured player after a nasty clash with Human Nature at the edge of a box. It is Hope. Human Nature gestures that she got the ball first. The reply shows that she didn’t even see Hope coming and it appears that the clash was unintentional but the decision is right, it is a yellow card offence. The medical team is called on the pitch by the ref. She’s the spark in Humanity’s midfield going forward but she’s also tracking back each time HUMANITY loses the ball. Hope is Humanity’s best player.
- 45MIN. Another huge miss, this time by Ignorance. People keep breaking the restricted movement
- 44MIN. A decent chance for HUMANITY. Right from the counter-attack, Solidarity has a decent chance to alter the result before halftime. It got past Hate in the goal but the angle was too narrow ): Cuba sends medical staff to Italy.
- 43MIN. Huge chance for Humans. Fear misses out on a sitter, hitting a crossbar. Gun sales in the USA soars but no shots were fired. There will be 2 minutes of added time
- 42MIN. As we’re nearing halftime, Team Humans are in control again. Humanity however looks more determined and organised as opposed to the early stages of the game, when they have appeared without any game plan whatsoever
- 40MIN. NO GOAL! Good decision by the Video Assistant Referees. Stupidity wasn’t in the offside position but Human’s right-winger (Human Nature) interfered with a play from an offside position
- 39MIN. VAR. Stupidity nets the ball from a short-range after a quick combination with Fear and Ignorance, with shoppers fighting in the supermarkets over food. VAR is investigating a possible offside after appeals from Humanity
- 36MIN. PENALTY! GOAL 2:3. Sane had anticipated the direction but Greed’s blasted the penalty through the keeper fingernails. Another error in Humanity’s defence, almost identical to the one from the 7th minute. Senators sell their stock shares to cash out. It appears that it wasn’t just politicians. Jeff Bezos and a few others knew as well ):
- 32MIN. Another chance for HUMANS! Fear nearly scores with a lucky header from an inch-perfect Vanity’s free-kick. Reported cases of locals became acting out of fear towards foreigners as well as people from any large urban areas affected by the virus ):
- 28MIN. GOAL!! 2:2. We are all square. Humanity fights back once again with Kindness, this time through people making face masks and donating them to the first liners in hospitals, supermarkets, Post Offices and so on. We have a match here!
- 25MIN. Chance for HUMANS! After a short spell of chaos in HUMANS’s team, Selfishness nearly punishes the weak defence of Humanity again, this time by acting like its needs have to be attended to first, regardless of the seriousness of the situation of others. “Repatriate me first. Why can’t I cross the border?” and so on…
- 23MIN. HUMANITY hits the woodwork again! Humanity appears to be back in the game! Gratitude combines with Togetherness in the midfield and nearly scores with a long-range shot. People across Europe show support towards the Health Workers. Great strike!
- 21MIN. GOAL!! 1:2 Kindness scoring after a great one-touch combination with Hope, Wholeheartedness should also take credit for snapping the ball away from Vengeance in Humans’ half. Human’s right back Vengeance hasn’t seen the ball much yet and it appears to be a weak spot in Humans’ defence or it’s just not entirely in the game yet. Reports have it that people offer their help to strangers with advice, translations and updates 🙂
- 19MIN. Humanity appears to be encouraged by the goal. Currently, it’s been almost in control of the game for the last 4-5 minutes. Various restrictions and protocols are introduced by governments around the globe
- 15MIN. HUMANITY hits the woodwork! Against the run of play, Humanity surprised everyone with a counter-attack through the left-wing and Togetherness nearly pulls one back with a header after an inch-perfect centre by Hope. The play was executed in a spectacular Italian fashion from the edge of the box. Italians are pulling together and sign songs together from their balconies 🙂
- 11MIN. Humanity is unable to make more than few passes without being robbed off the ball by determined Humans
- 9MIN. Let’s go back to the penalty decision. It’s a classic Humans’ style. The controversial part is that their team rely a lot on the outside interference of their leaders to help them score more goals, like in this case. The referee’s argument is that the leaders, who take decisions about various procedures, including the Coronavirus countermeasures, were elected by humans, and the controversy is that rather than what are the actual politicians’ programmes, most voters appear to base their decision on various political slogans as if it was some sort of interactive drama show. The rule book, therefore, states: Humans elected their leaders who told them that the virus will pass and that there’s no reason to take any drastic measures. The referee, therefore, made a correct decision
- 7MIN. PENALTY SAVED! The overconfident Politics blasts the penalty over the bar!
- 6MIN. PENALTY! Horror start for Humanity. The simple combination between Ignorance, Stupidity and Politics in a box leads to a terrible error in Humanity’s defence. Decency, Integrity, Wholeheartedness are being bullied by HUMANS’ attack, especially through the right-wing by ignoring the threat of the virus at the cost of the economy with a pinch of vanity. Herd immunity? Really?
- 5MIN. GOAL! 0:2. Stupidity scores a bizarre header after a well-executed free-kick by Selfishness. People buying excessive amounts of toilet paper in panic, not leaving any behind for others. Robberies for toilet paper are also reported (:0
- 3MIN. Humans are totally dominating the game, Humanity has barely seen the ball
- 1MIN. GOAL!!! 0:1 Classic direct centre-forward play. Greed proves its efficiency by scoring from a sitter with its first touch of the ball in the 1st minute of play after a smoothly executed attack through the right-wing by buying out respirators, face masks and hygienic products to sell them for profit. There are also reports of armed robberies of face masks. Humanity’s defence looks like they haven’t started the game yet
PEEP, the match is on!
TEAM HUMANITY (3-4-2-1): Sane,
Decency (Courage 72′), Integrity, Wholeheartedness, Responsibility, Togetherness, Hope, Gratitude (Love 72′), Kindness, Solidarity, Intuition
Subs: Learning, Passion, Understanding, Courage (72), Open-Mindedness, Goodwill, Love (72)
TEAM HUMANS (3-2-2-3-1): Hate,
Vengeance (Prejudices 59′), Idiocy, Vanity, Selfishness, Fear (Violence 59′), Ignorance, Stupidity, Human Nature, Politics, Greed
Subs: Bigotry, Prejudices (59′), Narrow-Mindedness, Violence (59′), Impatience, Self-righteousness, Isolation
Referees: Situation, Justice and Precision